Frequently Asked Questions

If you did not find the answer to your question below, please get in touch

Remember, the crisis is a short-term event, and you will not feel like this forever.
You don’t want to worsen it by hurtful or ineffective communication and actions towards your partner or yourself.
You may not have much control over the current relationship situation; however, you still have control over yourself, your behaviour and your actions.
Your brain is in a heightened emotional state, and you can’t think straight. Not a time for decision-making.
You can improve your well-being by breathing, exercising, being in nature and connecting with friends or family.
If you feel at risk of harm from your partner, leave to a safe place if that’s possible, engage Shine for assistance with domestic violence (0508 744 633) or call the Police (111) if in immediate danger (push 55 if you can’t speak).
If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts, seek professional help NOW

Lifeline –
0800 543 354 (0800 LIFELINE)
or free text 4357 (HELP)

Suicide Crisis Helpline –
0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO)

Please note that I am not able to provide crisis service and support.

If your situation is very stressful, I will do my best to offer you the earliest appointment available, usually within a few days.

You keep having the same fight - over, and over again;
You lost connection to your partner and you get more emotional support outside of your relationship than in it;
You and your partner have experienced major rupture or transition in your relationship
Your partner asks for couples counselling - your partner is communicating a desire to understand, connect and repair;
You aren’t the partner you want to be – you don’t play in accordance to your values and priorities
You are coping with an issue that might be affecting your relationship (such as mental health or substance use);
You’re unhappy with your sex life – loss of desire or lack of intimacy;
You feel stagnant or stuck familiar patterns
You have problems communicating with each other - talking with each other has become difficult or extremely negative;

Negative outbursts are frequent, and one or both of you has displayed out-of-control behaviour that is harmful.
You considering to leave your relationship but don’t know how – or if I really should.

You seem to be avoiding conversations about any difficult issues / topics
You feel you lost yourself in this relationship and you don’t know who you are anymore
You started a new relationship or preparing for a marriage and want to maximize your opportunity to build loving, fulfilling and lasting relationship
I love my partner but I don’t know how to overcome the anger and resentment I feel for him
Do you want to learn how to hold two competing ideas and still be able to love each other?
Are you sick of blaming and fighting? Do you want to become who you aspire to be?
Are you in limbo of not separating and not committing?